I am amazed at the number of men who think a certain book or website about FemDom is terrific, BUT they are reluctant to ask their wives to read it because such-and-such chapter is a tad too intense, or some of the language is a shade too blue, or the cover is too risqué. Many MSWs are looking for a “non-threatening” way to introduce FemDom to their ladies. Non-threatening? Give your heads a shake, gentlemen. We submissives are the ones who should feel threatened: at the thought of never realizing the life we know we need; then again at the thought of it becoming a reality. We’ve all heard the adage about being careful what we wish for. When wives embrace their female authority and dominate us, there will likely be times when we’ll wish we’d kept our mouths shut. Think about that! (Tweaks the submissive feelings even more, doesn’t it.)

A word of caution. Don’t study and study until you’ve read all that’s ever been written (you’re procrastinating). And don’t over analyze. It shouldn’t take you more than a couple of months to read, say two or three books and to visit the prime websites. Then pick one you liked the most and give your wife the book already. Or direct her to a website. As you do this, you MUST say to her something very close to, “Sweetheart, I’ve been thinking a lot about our future. This book [website] holds the key to a new chapter in our marriage that I believe will make us both very happy. There’s a lot of information here but it would mean the world to me if you’d read it. All of it not just part of it. I can’t wait to hear what you think about it because it makes a lot of sense to me. So when you’re ready, we’ll talk.”

Then zip it. Shut your pie hole and say no more. Oh, she may quiz you with 20 questions. “What’s this about? What kind of information? Do you think our marriage is in trouble?” Do not, repeat, DO NOT get caught up in this. You’ll likely end up stammering something wishy-washy like, “Well, errr ah, it’s kinda about relationships where the wife sorta, but not necessarily, runs the show and….” Worse, you might say something REALLY stupid like, “I know that spanking and foot-worship and all might sound too weird at first, but actually I was kinda hoping…” Don’t do it. Feel the weight of those balls you’ve grown and maintain your posture. Look her in the eye, smile and say to your wife, “Sweetheart, it’s all good. Better than good. But its taken all my courage to show it to you. So please just read it because it explains things better than I can. Then we’ll talk.”

Women are largely curious creatures, so you can bet she’ll act on your request. When she does, let’s face it, the notion of FemDom is such that it’s not likely she’ll be ambivalent. It’s a pretty safe bet her initial reaction, apart from surprise (shock) will fall on one side or the other, positive or negative, to one degree or another. If she reads all or most of the material you’ve given her, the chances are darn good she’ll come back to you on the positive side. She may be skeptical, she may be suspicious, but if she’s at least receptive to talking about FemDom, that’s positive—and a quantum leap forward. Obviously everyone is different, so it’s impossible to predict how each woman will be thinking at this point.

Remember that while you’ve been thinking about this for quite some time, it’s all new to her. At the very least, she will no doubt be judging your sincerity, conviction and the degree to which you aspire to many of the aspects associated with FemDom. So go ahead and talk with her. Answer her questions honestly. By all means admit to your submissive feelings and desire for her to dominate you. This is not, however, a time to negotiate: I’ll gladly do the dishes every night if you’ll wear leather and spank me once a week. Nor is it a time to issue an agenda of what you want and don’t want. Simply tell her that you would like her to embrace her female authority to whatever degree and at whatever pace she feels comfortable. This puts the key in her hands to open whichever doors she chooses, when she desires to open them.


oldbear said...

I like the honesty you espouse, and the use of written or web words to say better what we might stumble on. KUDOS senor!