The normalcy of abnormality


The July-August 2008 issue of Psychology Today featured this provocative cover, along with an article from which I’ve include a few excerpts.

A man trolls through web sites, searching for someone to fulfill his fantasy. Waves of anticipation alternate with a nagging fear that he will be exposed as a freak, a pervert as being abnormal.

What would his friends and family think of him if they knew his secret goal in life was to marry and kneel and kiss, and even lick, the feet of a dominant woman? What if they could read the thoughts lurking inside his mind, dark thoughts of being locked in a chastity device or turned bare-ass over his wife's knee for misbehaving in a manner that displeased her.

According to this Psych Today article, Feelings or habits... that are out of the ordinary can cause anguish to those who can't understand—and don't appreciate—their own outrĂ© tendencies. Of course some people are proud to be twisted, and even cultivate strangeness, but why do many others obsess over not being normal?

Says Dustin Wood, an assistant professor of psychology at Wake Forest University in North Carolina, "Normality is the barometer people use to figure out if they're acting the way they should be."

It turns out that Wood supposedly has made the ‘surprising’ discovery that being normal is actually extraordinary… or, umm, abnormal. He says that normal is comprised of an unusual combination of specific traits that all have to do with being extra likable. People who see themselves as most normal (and are seen that way by others) are much less neurotic than the average person, uncommonly easy to get along with, unusually respectful of propriety, and highly responsible.

But alas, normal people may be nicer than average, but they also have character traits that aren't universally appealing. According to Wood, they're not adventurous. They're not above average in intelligence, nor are they outgoing. Truth be told, a lot of our best qualities are unusual, or--you guessed it--ABNORMAL.

Now if you’re anything like me, right about now you’re shaking your head and saying to yourself, “What the hell?” This is probably exactly why the editor of Psych Today decided they needed to punch up newsstand appeal by splashing a dominatrix on the cover. Give readers a spicy graphic and teaser headline and maybe they’ll be too stupid to ask intelligent questions.

Journalism like this makes we want to not read much of anything being cranked out by the mainstream media these days. So much of it amounts to being nothing more than a pile of crap, as evidenced by the whip-wielding babe in the dominatrix outfit. Obviously the emphasis here is on selling newsstand copies versus meaningful reporting that might actually help a reader.

What some of us really want is insight allowing us to accurately access whether or not VeezKnight and Goddess V are twisted wackos for creating this blog? Or whether or not YOU are a pee in the same pod for reading it? Or whether or not those of us in or seeking FemDom relationships are hopelessly too far outside of acceptable mainstream behavior. Or whether or not maybe, just maybe we are on the cusp of a dramatic change in our society from patriarchy to matriarchy?

I wonder: does it really matter? If we are to glean anything at all from the lackluster PT article, it’s the fact that normalcy is apparently a less than abundant commodity in our society. Who’da thunk it! Moreover, in some learned camps, being normal is consider to be, in a word--BORING.

So who the hell cares? Besides, even if you do lust over being whipped by a powerful dominatrix, I’m thinking that maybe, just maybe you aren’t so out-of-the-ordinary. Check out the website of Mini Cooper of Canada. It features a PVC clad domme wielding a whip, flogger, paddle and feather tickler. Oh yeah, she’s supposed to be selling Mini Coopers… but is she really? As the Canadians say, ya gotta give your head a shake.

Check it out

One picture is worth a thousand words


This photo apparently is currently circulating throughout email land, and was forwarded to me this morning by a married friend who, while being an "in-charge" kinda guy, has been happily married long enough to know who REALLY leads the relationship. The subject line of the email read: A man's life summed up in one photo!! I got a good laugh when I opened the email and saw the picture. Indeed, it does pretty much say it all. The interesting thing is that most men will look at this picture and smile and pass the email on to a buddy. That's because most guys in their heart of hearts know this to be true. A submissive man knows better than most that it is through our own sexuality that women have the ultimate power to control us. The hell of it is, this is not something that men voluntarily give to women. It was wired into us by Mother Nature, so there must be a damn good reason for it—don't ya think?