I’ve read a goodly amount—too much even—about chastity devices. Should be used. Should not be used. This one is good. That one sucks. It’s a treat for him. It’s a punishment for him. Look, we’re all reasonably intelligent adults here. Part of the real magic in FemDom comes from the male willingly and voluntarily submitting to his woman. That includes voluntarily empowering her with authority over his sexual release. If a Domme had to seize that control and enforce it either with a CD or some sort of reprisal, then it would be meaningless to her. It would have no value. She wants him to give it to her as proof of his adoration for her, as proof of his trust in and respect for her authority. She wants to be his sole source of sexual gratification.

The way I see it, arguments over which CD is more secure or whether or not a CD should even be used, are mute. Come on guys, let’s face one simple fact: if a man wants to escape, he will. Goddess V has seen me figure creative approaches around a lot of challenges… using tools. Ever heard of tools that cut through steel let alone flimsy made in China plastic? One needn’t be a Houdini to figure a way out if that’s where ya wanna go. So if a CD is used in a FLR it really is just a symbol of his submission to her authority. And if a guy is on the honor system and wants to enjoy a private wank now and then without getting caught, make no mistake; he can do it. If he gets caught, it’s because he wanted to.

And all the talk about preventing erections! I don’t get it. So what if a guy wakes up with morning wood? It’s not sexual. So what if he has a wet dream? Again, it’s NOT sexual! It’s called physiology and it’s part of being a man. It has absolutely nothing to do with his sexual arousal. Therefore it does not reflect on his Domme’s lack of control over his sexual release. Don’t get me wrong. Goddess V is the sole object of my sexual desires. Because I love her, because I willingly submit to her authority, and because I trust her with that authority, I think she should have total control over my sexual release. Whether she wants me to wear a CD for a day or a week, or whether she wants me to wear it at all, makes little difference in the end. Like everything else, it’ll be whatever we find works for us. In the end, the only thing that matters is that our marriage is better—no, much better—in a FemDom relationship, and we are happier in our roles than we were previously.


Lady Julia said...

Absolutely insightful post VK!

Aradia said...

Just wonderful, VK. Goddess V is a lucky Woman to have such an insightful male.

Goddess Aradia

Marquise said...

Sounds good VK.

Biff said...

Dear Veezknight,
You are quite correct; the most important thing is the happiness between you and Goddess V. While I would disagree about wet dreams not being sexual, given what I have been told by men, it is neither here nor there. Your gift to your Goddess is noble and furthers your happiness as a couple. I am so happy for you!

Jamie said...

Thanks for investigating the subtle area between "forcibly denied" and voluntarily refraining for pleasure for your Queen. As with so many other things in life, it's not one or the other - using a chastity device is as much a communication between to people as it is a physical domination -

- "I want you to refrain"
- "I want you to know that you're refraining for me"
- "I don't want to be able to get sexual relief whenever I want it"
- "I want you to know that I'm doing this because you asked"

I think it's much more those things than physical restraint. On the other hand, when one is single or not in a relationship where the power dynamics are explicit, I think chastity devices can be far more of a "kink" activity. And to that end, a lot of thought as gone in to designing some pretty amazing metal devices.

Love your blog...

VeezKnight said...

To the dominant ladies, thank you!
To Jamie, that pretty much says it all.