Blog Readers Beware

It’s been about 10 months since I first began writing this blog. At the time there didn’t seem to be many blogs out here dealing with wife-led marriage. Since then a number have popped up, many of them written by submissive or submissive wannabe men. A few were supposedly penned by women and enjoyed a meteoric rise in popularity, mostly with men I’m guessing. I’m referring mainly to the blogs of Katherine West and Candace. Then suddenly, ziltch. Katherine’s has gone untended since June. Candace’s blog, along with Woman on Top, by (the other) Mistress Jen, apparently have gone the way of the delete key. It causes me to shake my head, but I can’t say as I’m surprised.

My personal feeling was that the West blog was in fact a prankster having a go at writing fiction. Man? Female? Who can say. As for Candace, she talked a good game… a little too good in my book for someone supposedly so new to this lifestyle. But she quickly had submissive men around the planet panting for more, more, more, only to be suddenly dealt “Blog Not Found.” Hmmm, I wonder. Someone who routinely comments on a number of FLR blogs recently observed the sudden appearance of Candace’s blog at the very time Katherine West’s blog went silent. Could this be similar to the hoax pulled by Stephen King, who, after becoming a best selling author writing horror novels, started over as Richard Bachman, just to see if he could do it again?

The supposed female author of another upstart FemDom blog alleges that she knows “E Sutton” to be a cigar smoking, whiskey swilling male who is having a good giggle over his charade. Thing is, most of us will never know for sure. Most of us who write and read and comment on blogs are anonymous and will likely always remain so. Anonymity can be a good thing, but the problem here is that it fosters too many pranksters and insincere people. And this is such a shame when you consider the subject matter. Because those of us who genuinely practice loving female authority know how well it works. The pranksters, the people who take pleasure in baiting readers with insincere sensationalism give the rest of us a bad name.

So I would urge everyone who reads blogs, this one included, to very carefully consider what you read before you accept it as truth or proof… OF ANYTHING. The burden is on you to use your head, to really think about what you read. Does it make sense? Does it ring true? Do the pieces fit? Is it plausible? Logical? Is it even believable? Come on, guys. Don’t let your fantasies and wishful thinking cloud your judgement.

Just this weekend Goddess V and I were standing on our deck talking. We’ve recently run into a situation with some friends who seem to be less than happy with their personal lives and marriages. Goddess V said to me, “This lifestyle works so well, how do we better promote it to people?” I responded that other than doing what we already are, I don’t know. It’s not as if we can come out and broadcast it to everyone we know and meet, although I think Goddess V has come dangerously close to doing just that on occasion. It’s interesting to note that even the VOT Society is struggling with the same issue. Goddess Barbara’s book sales reportedly generate less than half of the funds needed to run their website. Goddess B foots the rest of the obligation out of her own purse and the strain has caused her to drop out for a while to regroup and most likely rethink how to proceed to promote the message she holds dear.

Happily, in addition to VOT there are a few authors of blogs and websites that, in my opinion, are genuine and worth reading. I won’t mention them specifically, but if you’ve read some of my past entries here, you know who some of them are. Not so surprisingly, most have been around for some time and seem as if they will be around in the future. I’m glad they are, because if they hadn’t been, I seriously doubt Goddess V and I would be enjoying the relationship we have today.


Anonymous said...

On Elise Sutton: I suspect there is a real womyn out there producing her web pages. When I first started reading her material I did a "whois" search on her domain and back then it returned a female owner's name with Maryland address. For privacy reasons I will not reveal those findings and the owner is now blocked. I suspect Ms. Sutton's forum is actually a promotional site for the CB3000, et al.

I also agree Candace 'got it' too quickly.

Queen'sKnight1 said...


What you say about not being able to know for sure is definitely true.

I may be the one who observed that the rise of Candace coincided with the waning of Katherine (actually Candace began posting before Katherine stopped), but that could be coincidence as well. They have similarities in style, but not the same style.

Just a point to note: Candace once gave me her e-mail address so that I could ask some questions that she might not want to appear publicly. I wrote to her on Tuesday to find out what was going on and I received a reply today (Friday).

You may be aware that another blogger (submale) had been making vitriolic attacks on Candace, saying that her form of FLA/FLR was not authentic as is his relationship with his mistress. He based these statements on the notion that real FLR/FLA only exists in heavy BDSM levels of edge play (my paraphrase). When Candace's blog first started, this other blogger immediately began replying to her every post, trying desperately to lead her to become the kind of dominatrix he believed a dominant woman SHOULD be. As she began to discover that was not the kind of person she wanted to be, he became more and more antagonistic towards her. Personally, I felt that she really was trying to feel her way into the role of dominant woman and was in the process of discovering that her own style was soft and loving. I had a sense that she was growing, changing, and discovering herself as the blog progressed.

In her last couple of posts, Candace was quite distraught about these attacks. In her e-mail today, Candace said that this stress was compounded by a feeling that she just had to "publish" every day, that the time required to maintain the blog was becoming more of a burden to her relationship than a benefit to it. She says she didn't want that to be the case.

I think time can be a considerable factor in blogging. I know that you have said that you and your lovely V initially had hopes of writing much more frequently than you find real life allows. I believe that is quite true. For my own self, it is the reason I limit my own writing to replies to the blogs of others and not to maintaining my own blog. I am probably the one to whom you refer in this regard. Rather than starting a blog that I am solely responsible for managing, I post frequently on:

There I feel I can be one voice among many voices, but I like not needing to be the dominant voice in the discussion. I have encouraged Candace to post there occasionally when she feels the urge and has the time. fd says he would love to share the forum with Candace as well.

Please know I am not seeking to be disagreeable, but simply offer a perspective from a different viewpoint. I was happy to see that you had posted today. It had been awhile!

Bonnie said...

Just thought I'd share the fact that Kathrine has posted again... about 5 hours ago according to my RSS feed

faninho said...

Life in the net really seems to be difficult. But I think it is easy. Just take what you get. WYSIWYG- no one can tell the truth behind a nickname, behind some words which make you laugh, aroused or angry. The world is a fake- but we are the ones to complain it... why? Why not take Candace like Candace appeared? Because we are suspicious, because we are afraid of beeing cheated- is it because we are cheating ourselfs?
The truth of Candaces identity - who knows? I can choose my own out of it. And I did.
There was a beautiful, bright and smart human beeing (for me it was/is) from whom I liked to read. She did not have to appear 7 times a week.. But it was not only pleasure. She brought up the most important issues of the subject- didn´t she? If not, than the comments did....We don´t know why she managed this so precisely- but it was very well done, very aesthetic and tastefully illustrated. Not so bad for a private vision. Not so bad to have those images of a female led marriage in mind! I am sorry that "the net" obviously was not suitable for her (or vbbuher team, or whom ever) any longer- I miss that style. Thats all.

curious sub said...

i dearly miss Candice and wish I had printed her blog entries before they vanished. I was hoping to have my wife read them. They would make a great introduction to LFA.

jssubc said...

Well put, got to admit i had the same suspicions myself.

Miss Fortune said...

dearest Veeznight,
I closed my blog Woman on Top for the time being. A man who I knew had found it and was reading it and it caused me some anxiety. I had to take it down because of the fact that he knows my location,etc. I wanted a place for anonymoity, not discloser. I will be back in action soon!